Things I Learnt About Marriage

On 1 November 1997, next to the Vaal river, Stefan and I tied the knot. It was the start of an adventure together.

In our twenty years of marriage, here are three things I came to appreciate:

1. Better Together

The longer we are married, the more I recognize the differences between us, and appreciate them. For example – my focus to complete tasks and reach goals, is softened by Stefan’s focus on people. Since I’m so task-oriented, I have learned through Stefan’s example to become a lot more people-oriented and I’m always muttering to myself “people first”. Hopefully we balance one another.

2. You Can Do It (And Then Discover You Love It)

I’m not very adventurous. Stefan is an adrenaline junkie. In our early years of marriage. Stefan often tried to convince me that I would enjoy something wild, with the opposite outcome. A few of those stories are still entertaining others at dinner parties (have I mentioned para-sailing over the Mediterranean sea…). Through trial and error, he learned my limits and when he now asks me to join him on one of his rides, I can know that I will enjoy it, even though the idea of it leaves me cold (or nauseated).

The same can be said about him joining me in discovering new worlds in books, movies and places to visit. Our tastes are still very diverse, but we have a more comprehensive appreciation of our world.

3. How Jesus loves His Bride

The Bible speaks about the Church as the Bride of Christ and how much He loves His Bride. I could not have asked for a better groom than Stefan to mirror some of the love I know Jesus has for me. I’m so grateful for Stefan’s obedience to the Lord and him spurring me on to love the Lord more and serve Him better.

I also recognize the faithful prayers of partners for our marriage and family. We think of your prayers as a shield around us and our marriage. We are humbled and grateful for your part as we celebrate this big milestone. Thank you!

Did you know?

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4 thoughts on “Things I Learnt About Marriage”

  1. Dear Marie,
    thank you for sharing these special reflections with us. My wife (Trudi) and I have been married for over thirty years and over that time have come to love one another even more deeply than as first – I tease her and say that we have now just started to quite like each other. It is the differences between us that make us stronger together. You may remember me – I came to your table at Rosebank Union to tell you that I was going to Orlando for a conference in early October. I went to the conference and took Trudi along as well. Unfortunately, the time was so short and there was so much to do that we did not have a chance to come and visit you. We stayed at the Marriott Cypress Harbour Villa’s which was a great experience. All the best and keep on sharing (and being adventurous). Kevin and Trudi McLoughlin

  2. My dearest lovely Stefan and Marie
    Wishing you another 20 years of great blessing and happiness. Sharing your life together as God planned it I love you so much kiss the children from me tot weer Siens

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